Kurt Hummel ★ GLEE (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
justbeingaqueen) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
newyorknoire2012-08-08 03:52 pm
justbeingaqueen) wrote in newyorknoire2012-08-08 03:52 pm
Entry tags:
"It was cold, lost my hold to the shadows of the night..."
Who: Kurt Hummel and Tina Cohen-Chang
What: Of darkness and time passed
Where: Identity Bar & Lounge, East Village, NYC
When: Sunday night... late
Places like this never much appealed to Kurt in the past, but he found himself taken quite a keen liking to his new haunt of the Identity Bar & Lounge in the East Village. It was trendy but with just a confident edge of gothic that gave it an edgy feel and somewhat made him feel at home. At least, as at home as he could be. Lately, it wasn’t easy for him to recognise a sense of belonging in anything, but he knew he was meant to be in New York City. Perhaps that had been his destiny all along, he just never expected life to take the turn for him that it did. He might exist, but he was lonely and lately, it was becoming more and more difficult to shake a deep-seated urge within him. It was beginning to all-consume him and he wouldn’t be satisfied until he began to pursue things.
His long, pale fingers caressed the neck of his wine glass and he looked down at his teasingly exposed wrist with the sentiment ‘Courage’ tattooed there in an elegant script. His tongue wet his lips but he couldn’t stifle a melancholy sigh that escaped him. Not even his personally designed outfit was lifting his spirits that night. He was restless and that really never led to anything contenting for those close to him these days. In many ways, he was still so young, yet most of the time, he felt like time had stood still. In a sense, it had. Losing Blaine, it was the worst thing that happened to him... and the very reason why he stepped out in front of that oncoming speeding car that night... but that was a story for another day.
He was just about to get up and leave, swivelling on his bar stool when his eyes locked on a familiar face enthusiastically entering the bar. It had been a long, long time since he had seen anyone from his old life... it was coming on to maybe eight years now. He was tempted to just bid a hasty retreat, but Saturday night in New York, it was the prime of social life. He would be lucky to make it out the door unnoticed. His appearance these days, it was hard to fly under the radar, especially considering he was famous before any of this happened. Damnit.
But still. What if she was still in touch with him?
He crossed his legs over at the knee and picked up his glass, nursing it in his hand. As She approached, he offered her a veiled smirk. “Well, well, well... the clientele these places collect. Long time no see, darling,” he offered Tina as soon as she was in reaching distance and when she turned towards the voice, he tilted his head slightly and made a soft tsk sound with a feigned pout. “Mike never put a ring on it then? Oh dear.”
Tina had grown up out of the Goth phase a long time ago. Though the spirit behind it had never really left her. She didn’t buy into the outwardly Goth appearance. She’d given up on being obsessed with death and thinking that purple streaks and clothing with skulls made her a Goth. Only tonight was a nod to herself, but she’d tried putting together the kind of outfit an old classmate would respect. The Jacket she wore looked more like a dress and would until she got out of it, but there were no over the top displays of flesh. No cleavage that would probably send a man running scared with breast-feeding flashbacks. No piercings visible that might have them questioning her taste for the unseemly. Even the pants she wore with the jacket seemed understated, but certainly tailored. Her black hair was slicked back into a perfect ponytail with hair not out of place and Tina actually seemed to go a shade paler when she heard the voice.
She paused, stopping to regard Kurt as he sat there. “Oh my god... It’s--” Eight years. It had been eight years with no contact. She’d known about the car accident but had never been able to get an answer as to whether he was dead or not. The general assumption was that Kurt had died, but here he was.
She wet her lips and fidgeted like she felt he really was looking through her soul and not just judging her for her outfit. Her hand pressed against the skirt of her jacket and she exhaled slowly before looking at her hand. “No, he never did. It wasn’t... It’s been over a long time.” And the thought still made her heart strings pull in a painful direction. Mike was her first love. He would always be special to her, and not many since him and lived up to the dancer.
Kurt held up his glass in a silent toast but he didn’t drink from it in the wake of it. Instead, he just placed it lightly back on the bar and leant forward, locking her gaze so she kept looking at him and not his glass to follow his movements. “You’re looking fabulous, darling. Tell me, what brings you to lovely New York City? Are you alone? Did you keep in touch with anyone from school?” Subtle, yet to Kurt, he had a purpose to all of this. A means to an end. As lovely as it was to see a face from his past, and one he used to be very close to, he didn’t trust her. He didn’t trust anyone, and he needed more time to get close to her before he decided if there was a chance he could. “Any attractive guy with amazing abs manage to take the resident ninja’s place?”
He watched her face, taking in every little inch of her eyes, her complexion and then offered her another small smile, assuring her he was open to any answers she could give him. His cell phone buzzed with a text message then, and there was a huffy, very Kurt-esque sigh when he took his phone out to check and found ‘Aidan’ sweeping across the screen. Kurt just flicked the screen off and put the device back into his pocket. “Spam texts. Who needs them, huh?”
Tina couldn’t look away from Kurt even as he looked at his phone. There was just something in his eyes that she couldn’t bring herself to ignore. And it was almost like if she did risk looking away then he’d be gone. He would turn out to just be a figment. She wanted to step closer but managed to keep her distance for now. “Thank you, you look pretty fucking fabulous yourself. I’m here on a publicity tour but I’m thinking about making it my home. Sea change is good for the creative juices. I’ve been hiding out in Japan for a couple of years. And yes, I’m alone. I don’t know anyone here, apart from you. But I wasn’t actually expecting to see you. It’s a nice surprise.” Tina frowned a little at the question before she gave a shake of her head. “Not as much as I want. I get the occasional email but most of the time I’m locked away writing my novels.”
She smiled at that. Proud of herself for how she’d been trying to literally write the wrongs that was Twilight. She hated that that book had even gotten a hold of the hive mind of society. It wasn’t vampires. Not the way they should be. Not the way Tina imagined them. It had made her very determined to set things right. “No one. It’s why I change my number just about every time I change countries. It’s a weird habit, I know. How about you? What brings you here?”
There was a light shrug of Kurt’s slender shoulder. “I’ve always been here, darling. There’s very little that makes me leave these days. It’s the city that never sleeps, and that’s... somewhat fitting. It’s easy to become a creature of the night here.” He gave her a wink and pointed. “See what I did there? Wasn’t that clever? Vampires, right? That’s what you write about? I can’t imagine what would have given you a notion to right about such fantasy, but I hear you have done really well for yourself, no? Twilight, eat your heart out. And I’m glad to hear I’m a nice surprise. Some wouldn’t concur with that sentiment. Most think I’m dead,” he offered with a brief laugh and a small dismissive flick of his perfectly manicured fingers.
“Career and college brought me here. I just never left, despite popular opinion. I’ve been so busy, I lost touch with everything. The life of a celebrity is demanding, and there is only so many hours of sunlight in the day, right?” he continued and shifted on his stool to toy with his glass again. “Let me buy you a drink, darling. So, there is no one from Lima you stayed in touch with?” he added, his cool blue eyes once again intent on her gaze.
Tina’s head cocked at his choice of words before she finally just smiled and laughed. “Well, yes. There is that. Another reason why I’m here. Where better to get a burst of inspiration than New York? I’ve been here a few times but never really stayed.” Tina finally moved to take the empty stool next to him and made herself comfortable before she looked at Kurt again, the smile fading just slightly. “I can’t deny I was one of those who had started to believe the rumours. It’s a nice surprise because I’m just really glad you’re not dead. I’ve actually missed you. I mean, I don’t get to swap sweaters with anyone these days. No one has quite the same taste as you. And yes, I write about vampires. Pretty predictable, huh? Someone has to redeem their reputation though. That series did nothing but corrupt a whole generation into thinking vampires were sparkly douchebags.”
She nodded in agreement, understanding completely even if she was a different form of celebrity. She at least still had some credit among the literary circle. It wasn’t all just blockbusters and a flash in the pan obsession with her books. Tina had refused to give up the rights to her book for a long time because she had yet to meet a director or studio that could do her vision justice. “Thank you, I’d appreciate it. Whatever you’re having is fine. Not really. I mean there’s the odd email at Christmas where everyone sums up what they’ve been doing, but nothing of any substance. I feel sad about, but this is growing up, right? This is being an adult.”
Kurt waved his hand up and down his length. “Well, as you can see, I’m very much still in this world. It’s going to take more than bit of an accident to knock a Hummel down...” Even if it was a lot more than just a bit of an accident. The car had hit him and almost killed him on impact. If Aidan hadn’t been ‘conveniently’ nearby with a sense Kurt was in danger, nothing would have saved him. As it was, it all happened so quickly and Kurt was technically taken against his will, so to speak. Boy, did that lead to some extensive silent treatment once he learnt the ins and outs of things. Even to this day, he still used it to his advantage. He was pretty sure Aidan didn’t know what hit him picking Kurt that day. He was feisty and very much brought his sassy gay bitch attitude with him. “And also take pride in designing my own sweaters these days. Some of us had to make it out of Lima and succeed right? Oh, my favourite was the undead conceiving new life. As if that wasn’t enough, the child wanted to eat the mother. How unclassy...”
He glanced at his glass, still filled to capacity with a dark red wine. “Expensive taste, it’s lucky I’m rich,” he noted and then delicately snapped his fingers to get the barman’s attention and placed an order for another glass of the French red. “I must have conveniently fallen off people’s contact lists. I don’t spend a lot of time emailing these days, so I probably brought it on myself. And I know people a lot older than you, darling. You’re just a pup. Many good years of you ahead yet. Live a little. You never know when it could be all over, just like that,” he said lowly, a snap of his fingers to emphasis as his eyes made their way back to hers.
Tina made a gagging noise as she thought about that horrible birth scene. It was actually enough to turn her off the idea of giving birth to just a human child. She was amazed any teen girl had survived reading it with any maternal feelings in tact. But she managed a smile as she looked at Kurt and his clothes before finally breaking eye contact to look behind the bar as she studied the drink array. “Actually, one of the first things I did when I had a comfortable enough paycheck was to buy one of your sweaters. I adore it. It felt like I’d bought a piece of fashion history because I knew it was yours. Your design. I was so proud. Being an author doesn’t exactly pay immediately, so it wasn’t like I was splurging from the start. Are you okay, though? Did the accident leave you with any lasting injuries?”
She bit her lip briefly before smiling apologetically. “I’m sorry, I really didn’t mean to pick anything so expensive. I just assumed it would be easier. I’m happy with cheap alcohol. Even if you might judge me. “Would you even bother with emailing them even if you did?” Tina asked with a slightly teasing look. “It’s not as if I never wanted to contact you. I think I just got scared I’d get back some scary skull with a whole ‘KURT IS DEAD’ animated logo. Which is stupid, I know. Guess I didn’t let go of everything. So you’re frolicking with older types, hm? Do tell. Is there anyone in your life I should know about?”
Kurt found himself hit with a wave of nostalgia, but he didn’t outwardly show any distinct shift in emotion. As far as he was concerned, Tina walking into the bar tonight was fate. It helped seal a choice firmly in his mind, and as much as he wanted to interrogate her about a certain someone, he maintained self-control on that front. He would need to do some more searching before he made any rash decision, figuring that if she had any information, she would have supplied it when he asked. Unless she was avoiding the subject, but he wasn’t sensing any discomfort from her. Maybe some uncertainty, but no discomfort to indicate she was lying to him. “Well, when NYADA screwed me over in favour of a crazy stalker, I had to find a Plan B. I just never expected it to change my life on the level that it did. And I’m perfectly fine, darling. It was all over-hyped, apparently. Just a bunch of media whores searching for a good story. I wasn’t even left with a scratch.” He was fortunate on that front that it happened quickly enough that he maintained his appearance prior to the damage the car did to him. Any longer, and it would have been ghastly.
“It’s pocket change to me. My treat. Beautiful people deserve beautiful things. We’re more than entitled,” he said with an arrogant sniff. “And no, I really wouldn’t. These days, I do very little I don’t want to. For a long time people did believe me to be deceased. I had to recuperate and I had to do it out of the public eye. I had... friends who protected me and took care of me. I was lucky. And no, darling, there is no one you should know about,” he told her with a sweet, tight-lipped smile. At least, no one he was going to share with her when he didn’t trust her as far as he could brush lint from her shoulder.
Tina had heard snippets about Blaine, but she had no idea where he and Kurt stood and she really didn’t know enough to get involved. She didn’t know if Blaine would want her sharing what she did know. She didn’t even know if Kurt wanted to know. It was strange to be talking to her former classmate after all this time. Someone she had once considered a good friend and to now feel like she had no idea what to say even if there was a part of their rhythm that appeared easy to get back. “You could have just told me it was over-hyped. You have no idea how hard I cried because I never got to return to you the green Dolce sweater. And then decided that if I still had it then maybe you would be alive because you wouldn’t want to leave this earth without wanting it back.” Tina shrugged a little before smiling softly. “I’m so glad you’re okay.”
Tina whistled low before breaking into a grin. “I’m glad I still fit under your beautiful people category. I’d hate to make you feel like you were wasting your pocket change. I also hope that you’ve spent some of that change on my novels and not just watch people give a dramatic reading over YouTube. I can’t even imagine what you must do with all that media attention. I can handle the occasional chat show but just the idea of the paparazzi constantly up in my face is terrifying. I have literally embraced being a recluse unless it’s nights like these and then I go full Goth just to throw people off my amazing Asian scent.”
“It’s okay, darling. That’s not a sweater I would have chosen to be buried in. I don’t think I was missing it. I am still not sure how anyone believed I was still designing from the grave, considering I had new collections out, but that stupid rumour hit the internet that I was pulling a Tupac and had catalogues of designs discovered in my studio or something that people were constructing after my demise. It’s not so. All my work takes blood, sweat and tears. Mostly blood, and just not always my own, but that’s beside the point. Once your death hits the internet, it’s very hard to make the conspiracy theorists believe otherwise. But as you can see, I’m here in the flesh, so of course I’m still here,” Kurt scoffed, even if he was selecting his words extremely carefully. He watched her closely and nodded. “I’ve been worse, darling. I promise. I’m as much to blame over the lack of contact as anyone else.”
He just laughed lightly. “I don’t mix with the unbeautiful these days. Consider yourself fortunate,” he joked and went back to nursing his own glass. “I have never read your work. But don’t take that personally. It’s just not my personal taste. The media is easy, I adore attention. The more the better, and I look fabulous enough, so why not have it all? I deserve it. I’ve worked hard enough. Some celebrities these days shouldn’t be anywhere near a camera, it’s appalling. Gothic, at its most finest, is stunning, darling. Have you ever thought about injecting more of the olde worlde into your novels?” Maybe then she would get some accuracy up in that business.
Tina frowned slightly at her own stupidity before she shook her head and buried her face in her hand. “Oh god, I’m so stupid! So, so stupid. Sooner or later I should realise that the internet is not actually full of the truth. I mean, this is the same source of information that leaked the “ending” to my third novel. Apparently there was an undead pregnancy but this one involved holy water. I’m not telling you more than that. I should have just contacted you outright. I have loved each of your collections though. I’m actually kind of glad that you got rejected from NYADA because you get this chance to give the world your unique taste.”
Tina smirked a little before she finally picked up her glass of red and took a small sip. He was right, it really was an expensive drop. She could taste it in the first sip alone. She didn’t pretend to know a lot about wine, but she knew she should feel honoured even tasting this red. “Wow... that’s... thank you for the drink, Kurt. Even that sip alone was worth it. And so was bumping into you. You look so... stunning. Definitely not a dead man walking. And no, it’s okay. I didn’t really think it would ever be your taste but I thought you might have suffered through it for my sake.” Tina’s eyebrow quirked slightly as she looked at him. “More of the olde worlde how? Like... ancestry?”
Kurt quirked an eyebrow at her when she rambled a little about the whole internet thing. She was nervous, he could feel it off her, but at the same time, he really couldn’t blame her. He hadn’t exactly done a whole lot to allay those conspiracy theories because the more ambiguity about where he was and what he was doing, the easier it was for him to remain concealed. It prevented too many people trying to get close and sniff around him, because frankly, he was still an infant with all of this and he wasn’t sure he was ready to try and let his family and friends get too close to him yet. He didn’t know how to interact with them as he was now, and it made him nervy. Making him nervy was never a good thing. It had led to a few disasters that Aidan had his hands full with when it happened, but Kurt was still learning. It was a process. But he was solely focused on one thing lately, and any tiny link to it, he would risk his fears to get information. Tina was an extremely conveniently placed source at the moment, and Kurt was going to use it. “The amount of things that involve Holy Water on the internet is mind-boggling these days,” he joked with a thin, veiled smile. “Don’t beat yourself up, though. I mean this with all due respect, but the more you tried to gain access to me, the harder it would have been to get to me.”
She was an author, she could read into that statement what she wanted, but he wasn’t going to elaborate. Every interaction he had these days, he preferred to be on his terms, in his control. It was the only way he could cope. He could never shake the sense he was incomplete or with a gaping hole of loss inside him, though he was assured it was probably just because certain events had occurred against his will in the past. He was pretty sure that had nothing to do with it, though. But he did have to laugh at her backhanded compliment, knowing she had no idea of the depth of it. “Well, you would know all about dead men walking, darling. Who am I to talk? And you don’t need my opinion on your work. Your work is your own, you make it whatever you want it to be. Approval first comes from within. And I mean more of the historical artistic side of Gothic. It was an art way, way before it was black nail polish and lacy clothing with skull cameo brooches. Twelfth century Paris is a stunning era... so many secrets to be told or interpreted, as what fiction is. Just because someone is interpreting something and manufacturing it between the pages of a book, does not make it real or accurate. A fact a lot of people prefer to forget and be swept up in the comforting nook of fantasy.”
Tina was trying to relax and she couldn’t deny the wine was helping. She took another sip before she was looking at him again but this time there was a little confusion, maybe even hurt in her expression. She could understand to a degree if he’d wanted to limit contact after the accident, but the fact that he had just seemed to cut himself off completely hurt. Then the fact that he would tell his “people” not to let her, or anyone else contact him hurt more. “So why are you letting me talk to you now? What’s changed to consider me worthy of even breathing your air?” She couldn’t help asking the question. She knew she shouldn’t, but it was there right on the tip of her tongue and apparently she wasn’t just going to mention the elephant in the room but just walk right up and lick it.
However as if flicking a switch, but when the conversation steered back towards the creative world her eyes lit up and she got a crooked smile. “Oh, well, if that’s what you mean then I think I might actually enjoy that. It would certainly mean that I could explore the origins better. Return to basics as it were instead of focusing on vampires in the modern world. It really is starting to feel a bit overdone. Mostly because I keep waiting for the publishers to push for a wedding or a birth or vampire children that can read minds. I mean, really... there’s only so much readers are willing to take a leap of faith with when they’re not teenage girls.” She tilted her head slightly as she took a careful sip of wine and seemed to consider all the possibilities. “I can practically write the opening on a napkin right now. I honoured you, you know. In one of my novels.”
Kurt’s teeth ran along the inside of his lip, and it took all his effort not to sassily bite back that they really weren’t sharing the same air anyway. But that would just open a can of worms he really had no intentions of going near. Instead, his tongue just traced slowly over his lips and the tip of his fingers explored the rim of his wine glass. “I’m a distinct believer in fate, darling. We’re here in the same place, at the same time, for a reason, and that is more than enough for me. In fact, I was just about to leave and still, we crossed paths. I think that’s a sign, don’t you?”
He was listening to her closely and intently. “Well, if vampires were in the modern world, I am sure one by now would have called you on your misleading information, darling. Or perhaps they’re just really good at being concealed,” he suggested with a laugh that indicated it was all just fictional fairy tales anyway and the idea of a vampire walking up to her to put her right was humorous. “It would certainly make for an interesting research interview for you, though. Robert Pattinson wouldn’t have had that little luxury. Teenage girls know no more about vampires or historical fact than I know about inserting a penis into a vagina. You honoured me? How so? Should I be concerned?” he teased.
“Well, yes. Of course. You do have me there. Like I said, it’s a really nice surprise. Some days it feels as if you never existed at all other than the fact that I remember you, and so do the others.” Tina smiled again though before raising her glass in a toast. “To fate and signs. Does this mean you might actually keep contact once we leave here, or is tonight all I get as far as fate goes?” She looked at him hopefully, unable to help it. She was only now starting to realise how much she’d missed having him to talk to.
Tina snorted in amusement. “Or maybe they hate me for sullying their reputations and their plotting a mass revolt. Though if Twilight didn’t make them come out of the woodwork I can’t imagine my novels would. I like the idea that they could be concealed though. That maybe they really do exist.” She shrugged with a laugh. “But I’m sure you think I’m still just ridiculously out of touch with reality. If any vampires were actually willing to give me an interview I might actually either pee myself with excitement or just scream and run away. Either way I think I’d just embarrass myself. And yes, I did. I wrote a homoerotic vampire story. You were the inspiration for one of the lovers.”
“Oh, I’m sure if our schedules allow it, darling, we can fit each other into our busy lives, no? That is depending if you remain in New York on a more permanent basis. The only time I really leave is to go overseas. I have... friends who are British and connected to France, so I’m a frequent flyer. Always somewhere to stay on publicity for my work. No matter how nearly dead I was, apparently people still want to wear my designs. It’s probably a good thing I didn’t decease or I would just be another notorious name someone else is designing for and I personally couldn’t think of anything worse. It would be like if you passed over and someone kept writing under your name. You would want to come back and haunt them,” Kurt pointed out, smirking. “Or perhaps beat them with your prior novels... the hardcover editions.”
He tilted his head slightly. “On the contrary, if they were wanting to be concealed, perhaps your work is a fine enough and respected red herring? And for that, maybe they are grateful for your existence. Who doesn’t like a good alibi when they’re trying to hide something? Or maybe even just a case of you exist in your world, and they exist in theirs, and never the twain shall meet, hm? Put it this way, though, if you were doing it wrong and disturbing someone’s peace, you wouldn’t be a successful and rich author. You would have been knocked off your pedestal well before now, so just bask in it, darling. If you find the recipe of success, the demand for your product will only get better. Homoerotic vampires, huh? Hopefully they know proper teeth etiquette in blow jobs... and what was my lover like? Hot, I hope. I’m entitled to only the finest of ass,” he added with a wink.
Tina’s eyebrows went up before she let out a gasp of excitement. “No wonder you suggested going back to the original Gothic roots of France. You’re lucky being able to travel that much. I have to for publicity but the rest of the time I just settle wherever I’ve travelled to for a few years before going to another place. I never really get to enjoy it unless I’m there for good. It’s why I was thinking about coming to New York for a while but now you have me wondering about France. Guess I’ll just have to see what fate has in store, hm? See if staying here does allow me a little of your time now and then.” She nodded in agreement though as she raised her glass once more. “Amen to that. I would beat them with the hard covers and not even think twice about it. No one will ever be you, Kurt. You’re one of a kind.”
She was looking at him quizzically once more but she just smiled off the questions he was raising. Something about the conversation was so strange. Like he shouldn’t be able to talk about vampires so easily but here Kurt was. Indulging her. “Well, yes. I could understand that. Even if a part of me really is itching to find out what it’s really like. To know if I have anything right. And then if I have it all wrong, I don’t know. I don’t know if I’d change the world I’ve created. And yes, teeth etiquette was a must and your lover was incredibly hot. Much like that dark-haired guy in the Tudors we always used to drool over.”
“The modern day interpretation of ‘goth’,” Kurt began, making little quotation marks with his fingers, “could probably be considered extremely offensive to what it truly is. Alas, back in those centuries, there wasn’t black nail polish, eyeliner and fishnet stockings. There wasn’t Rammstein to listen to or websites to go on and commiserate with your fellow emos. Most of whom would probably fall off their black-bedspreaded beds to realise there is actually a true historical existence of Gothic that has nothing to do what they’re involved in. Twilight is...” He just laughed then, looking down at the polished bar top that he traced circles over with his finger. “It’s fiction. What more can I say? As is modern day ‘gothic’. I would think people who existed in actual Gothic France would be rolling over in their graves at it all. Or, if you believe vampires exist, rolling their eyes extensively in the current day and amused that Dracula got the better of everyone.”
He swivelled on his stool and leant back against the bar with his elbow draped on it. His legs were crossed over at his knees and he drank in the interior of the bar and the crowd for a few moments, eyes surveying the scene. There was a Kindred woman over in the corner watching him keenly, Toreador no doubt... they had sensed each other as soon as they entered the room but a respectful distance had been kept so far. Hopefully it wasn’t another one of Aidan’s minions keeping a check on him. “New York is lovely, though. Many, many secrets like any city, but what is a city worth exploring if there is nothing there to discover? Itching to find out what being a vampire is really like, darling? Or what it is like to know they exist? I can’t imagine it would be much fun... and fine choice of fellow leading man. I have to admit, I have a weakness for the dark and handsome with nice asses.”
Tina pressed her lips together thoughtfully before she smoothed a hand down the ruffles of her jacket. There was one benefit to wearing Gothic inspired clothes and that was the fact it always made her sit up straight. It kept her posture very rigid. She glanced at a passing guy, sizing him up and down before she crinkled her nose a little. “Where do you think it really went wrong? It’s not all about those particular cliches. It had to have gone wrong somewhere. Most likely it was always when it was in the hands of an American. When some famous person butchered the look and everyone copied it. I don’t pretend to have gotten it right this whole time. I’ve tried to trace it back, return the roots so that I don’t have the original people rolling in their graves or vampires thinking I’m a joke.” She left her glass on the bar and reached up to run her fingers through her dark hair. “I think it’s only right that I do continue to return to the roots of all things gothic. I mean, hell, it was even a Sims 3 furniture back in the day.”
“I remember,” she murmured as he mentioned dark and handsome with nice asses. Just as well he never specified tall otherwise Blaine would have been in trouble. She rest her chin in her hand as she looked at him while she braced her elbow against the bar. “Kurt, can I ask you a serious question without you laughing at me? And it’s not about wanting to know what it’s like to be one, though I suppose that’s part of it. I mean, are they sad? Are they lonely? Or do they just hang with other vampires all the time. Do they ever truly love mortals or is that just us being wishful thinkers. Can they love given they’re not entirely human. But anyway, I know you can’t possibly want to spend this whole time talking about vampires. My question is actually related to where we started. Do you think we had our true loves? That our chance at it is just... over?”
Kurt shrugged a slender shoulder. “Merely pop culture, darling. It influences all of us, and for some more than others, it was a huge factor of building what we become as adults. Pop culture caters to people wants to rebel, be different, step out of the box, but it also caters to those who want to be lemmings or sheep and just follow the conformists. But what is put out there for us to absorb is what dictates everything. All it takes is for something to gain a following and it becomes a culture of its own. Your fanbase, for example. You’ve made yourself your own little piece of prized real estate in current pop culture, and that’s something to be proud of. You are influencing the way a large bunch of people are thinking and acting. When you think about it, it’s really quite a phenomenon. Influencing someone, or controlling what they do or how they react is really quite... invigorating,” he mused lightly. One of his developed skills he had come to be quite fond of, especially in using it for his own gain.
He rested his tongue between his lips and glanced at her casually. Short was always something Kurt had discovered a taste for in finding Blaine. Perhaps it turned out to be more of a curse than a blessing these days, in that his taste solely lay in people with talent and he always seemed to be more satisfied with the vertically challenged. He didn’t know if he was just projecting in what his heart was yearning for, but he was still very much learning to find his feet in this new life. “What is wishful thinking in a mortal falling for an immortal? Don’t you think, in essence, there wouldn’t be anything more heartbreaking than living forever and knowing that in comparison of your own existence, you have but a blip of time with your love? And I would argue that they are human, they’re just undead. But who am I to assume? You’re the expert, not me. I didn’t even like Interview with the Vampire, book or movie. I have never been able to come to Tom Cruise, no matter how short he is. And no. I don’t believe any connection of the soul is ever truly over. I don’t even believe it’s over when we... pass on.”
Tina couldn’t resist preening just a little bit. She flicked her ponytail as she grinned before batting her lashes and raising her wine glass once more. “Cheers to both of us having an impact on current culture. I know I kept wondering if you were alive or dead, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t had your designs seep through my subconscious. Also using Hayden Christensen for one of your campaigns was a masterstroke. I still just want to climb him and have my way with him, but hey. We can’t all get every dream we want. He’ll forever be my unobtainable one. I just don’t want my work to have a negative impact on pop culture. I’ve spent so long respecting it, respecting all the literature and songs and music and films that have influenced me... It’s hard to explain. I don’t want to be Rachel,” she finally finished with a laugh as she shot Kurt a look that was both slightly embarrassed and unashamedly devillish. Both of them had such a love-hate relationship with their former classmate.
Tina cleared her throat before nodding her head in agreement. “Which is exactly the trouble with writing this fiction. It’s not always about a happy ending. It’s not always about the vampire turning their lover so that they can be together forever. Sometimes it’s about that little blip of time and recording it for posterity. I love writing this genre but sometimes you just know it’s doomed from the beginning. Sometimes you just know that no matter how much you pour into the words it’s not going to end the way the readers might want.” Tina shrugged almost as if she was admitting defeat but the smile that shone through after was unmistakable. “Kind of like life. I mean, I get that romance should be an escape but it’s not always the focus. Sometimes I just want to write about vampires having adventures and sometimes I just want to write about the humans that adore them. So you still feel a connection to you-know-who?”
Kurt just smirked. “He contacted me and I was busy that week. My management mostly dealt with it. I hear he was lovely, though, so I don’t have to burst your bubble by telling you that your crush was a dickwad. You should tap that, darling. You’re more woman than Rachel Bilson will ever be. You actually have tits, that’s a good start.” More to the fact the shoot was midday in the middle of a beach in the French Riviera slap-bang in the middle of summer. He couldn’t have been present even if he wanted to, but the Star Wars actor had been a perfect height for the texture and patterning of Kurt’s collection, so it had all been very convenient. As nice as he was, Kurt just didn’t like them taller than him. The irony, considering he used to crush on Finn once upon a time that felt like forever ago. “It is impossible for anyone to be Rachel but Rachel, and considering she is already a washed-up has-been who can only get off-Broadway parts these days, at best, it’s hardly a fair comparison.”
His eyes cooled a little at this and he gave her a somewhat empty stare, almost like he was looking right through her. “You can say his name, he’s not Voldemort.” He turned his gaze to the woman in the corner and it locked for a long passing few moments, Kurt more than letting her know he was not only aware of her presence but the fact she was watching him. “Romance is often the most tragic and painful thing of all, darling. It consumes you, it devours you, and when it does that, it stays with you forever. If it ends before you’re ready, and you never say goodbye, your heart never truly believes it’s over. Sometimes, a heart is impossible to reason with. It wasn’t made to reason... if it was, we wouldn’t have been given brains.”
“Mm, if only. I wouldn’t even know how to tap him. Just because I have my own corner of the pop culture universe it doesn’t mean I run in those circles. I can’t just call him up for a booty call. He doesn’t know me from any other random creeper. I just wish you had, like, candid photos or something. That would have been amazing. Maybe one of these days we’ll wind up at the same press event. Or I’ll finally give up the rights to my books and he’ll star in one of the movies.” Tina smiled a little impishly before she took a sip of her wine. She still had the advertisements saved in her YouTube favourites, and a thousand gifs of it reblogged on her Tumblr. She was still a child of her times at heart. She just knew how to hide it now and again. “Okay, point. I was just saying. I also feel a little bad that I might have laughed when I read she got fired from that last big role.”
Tina’s skin seemed to break out in goosebumps at the stare but she said nothing. Didn’t dare question the look because in all honestly she was starting to wonder what he might do. “Blaine,” she finally said quietly. Then she frowned as she realised where his gaze had gone once more. If it had been any other guy she’d be wondering if he wanted to pick her up. But this was Kurt. He didn’t do women. “We still need brains to function. To send signals to the rest of our bodies. But our hearts would do the thinking. But I think I like that hearts are impossible to reason with. It wouldn’t be fun if they weren’t. We wouldn’t get impulses. We wouldn’t work on our desires. Such a catch twenty-two, huh?”
Kurt gave an indifferent shrug. “You’re a celebrity, think like a celebrity, darling. We can insert ourselves into the presence of others easily. Next time he’s at a business party, you can be my plus one. I’ll introduce you. And there you go. Consideration of making your books movies would be a fantastic kick-off for a conversation. Showbiz talk is always where it starts, even if we all profess not to want to talk shop when we’re off the clock. Deep down, we thrive on bragging about our achievements.” His long finger casually and slowly pushed his untouched glass of wine over the bar and away from him. It wasn’t like he had any intentions of consuming it.
“Blaine...” he repeated coolly after her, the name hanging in the air even as he fell silent. He paused to let the sensation of even just the name overcome him, and the restless, unsettled stirrings started to bubble up inside him, and he shot the woman in the corner a slight warning glare that she really, really shouldn’t come near him right now. He wasn’t feeling in a very accommodating mood for others of his kind all of a sudden. “And what is a Catch Twenty-two in vampire years, darling? You know what, I just realised the time. I really should be going. I have an early start in the morning. It was fabulous seeing you again. You should call me.” He took his business card from the inner pocket of his jacket draped over the back of his stool and slid it across the bar to her. He gave her some light kisses to both her cheeks, and then blew her another from his fingertips... right before he was, disappearing from the bar in a smooth yet pointed saunter. He needed sustenance, and he needed it now, but he knew if he stayed, Tina was going to be too much of a temptation for him and he just couldn’t do that to a friend, no matter how estranged they had been.
RP LOG, SCENE COMPLETE
What: Of darkness and time passed
Where: Identity Bar & Lounge, East Village, NYC
When: Sunday night... late
Places like this never much appealed to Kurt in the past, but he found himself taken quite a keen liking to his new haunt of the Identity Bar & Lounge in the East Village. It was trendy but with just a confident edge of gothic that gave it an edgy feel and somewhat made him feel at home. At least, as at home as he could be. Lately, it wasn’t easy for him to recognise a sense of belonging in anything, but he knew he was meant to be in New York City. Perhaps that had been his destiny all along, he just never expected life to take the turn for him that it did. He might exist, but he was lonely and lately, it was becoming more and more difficult to shake a deep-seated urge within him. It was beginning to all-consume him and he wouldn’t be satisfied until he began to pursue things.
His long, pale fingers caressed the neck of his wine glass and he looked down at his teasingly exposed wrist with the sentiment ‘Courage’ tattooed there in an elegant script. His tongue wet his lips but he couldn’t stifle a melancholy sigh that escaped him. Not even his personally designed outfit was lifting his spirits that night. He was restless and that really never led to anything contenting for those close to him these days. In many ways, he was still so young, yet most of the time, he felt like time had stood still. In a sense, it had. Losing Blaine, it was the worst thing that happened to him... and the very reason why he stepped out in front of that oncoming speeding car that night... but that was a story for another day.
He was just about to get up and leave, swivelling on his bar stool when his eyes locked on a familiar face enthusiastically entering the bar. It had been a long, long time since he had seen anyone from his old life... it was coming on to maybe eight years now. He was tempted to just bid a hasty retreat, but Saturday night in New York, it was the prime of social life. He would be lucky to make it out the door unnoticed. His appearance these days, it was hard to fly under the radar, especially considering he was famous before any of this happened. Damnit.
But still. What if she was still in touch with him?
He crossed his legs over at the knee and picked up his glass, nursing it in his hand. As She approached, he offered her a veiled smirk. “Well, well, well... the clientele these places collect. Long time no see, darling,” he offered Tina as soon as she was in reaching distance and when she turned towards the voice, he tilted his head slightly and made a soft tsk sound with a feigned pout. “Mike never put a ring on it then? Oh dear.”
Tina had grown up out of the Goth phase a long time ago. Though the spirit behind it had never really left her. She didn’t buy into the outwardly Goth appearance. She’d given up on being obsessed with death and thinking that purple streaks and clothing with skulls made her a Goth. Only tonight was a nod to herself, but she’d tried putting together the kind of outfit an old classmate would respect. The Jacket she wore looked more like a dress and would until she got out of it, but there were no over the top displays of flesh. No cleavage that would probably send a man running scared with breast-feeding flashbacks. No piercings visible that might have them questioning her taste for the unseemly. Even the pants she wore with the jacket seemed understated, but certainly tailored. Her black hair was slicked back into a perfect ponytail with hair not out of place and Tina actually seemed to go a shade paler when she heard the voice.
She paused, stopping to regard Kurt as he sat there. “Oh my god... It’s--” Eight years. It had been eight years with no contact. She’d known about the car accident but had never been able to get an answer as to whether he was dead or not. The general assumption was that Kurt had died, but here he was.
She wet her lips and fidgeted like she felt he really was looking through her soul and not just judging her for her outfit. Her hand pressed against the skirt of her jacket and she exhaled slowly before looking at her hand. “No, he never did. It wasn’t... It’s been over a long time.” And the thought still made her heart strings pull in a painful direction. Mike was her first love. He would always be special to her, and not many since him and lived up to the dancer.
Kurt held up his glass in a silent toast but he didn’t drink from it in the wake of it. Instead, he just placed it lightly back on the bar and leant forward, locking her gaze so she kept looking at him and not his glass to follow his movements. “You’re looking fabulous, darling. Tell me, what brings you to lovely New York City? Are you alone? Did you keep in touch with anyone from school?” Subtle, yet to Kurt, he had a purpose to all of this. A means to an end. As lovely as it was to see a face from his past, and one he used to be very close to, he didn’t trust her. He didn’t trust anyone, and he needed more time to get close to her before he decided if there was a chance he could. “Any attractive guy with amazing abs manage to take the resident ninja’s place?”
He watched her face, taking in every little inch of her eyes, her complexion and then offered her another small smile, assuring her he was open to any answers she could give him. His cell phone buzzed with a text message then, and there was a huffy, very Kurt-esque sigh when he took his phone out to check and found ‘Aidan’ sweeping across the screen. Kurt just flicked the screen off and put the device back into his pocket. “Spam texts. Who needs them, huh?”
Tina couldn’t look away from Kurt even as he looked at his phone. There was just something in his eyes that she couldn’t bring herself to ignore. And it was almost like if she did risk looking away then he’d be gone. He would turn out to just be a figment. She wanted to step closer but managed to keep her distance for now. “Thank you, you look pretty fucking fabulous yourself. I’m here on a publicity tour but I’m thinking about making it my home. Sea change is good for the creative juices. I’ve been hiding out in Japan for a couple of years. And yes, I’m alone. I don’t know anyone here, apart from you. But I wasn’t actually expecting to see you. It’s a nice surprise.” Tina frowned a little at the question before she gave a shake of her head. “Not as much as I want. I get the occasional email but most of the time I’m locked away writing my novels.”
She smiled at that. Proud of herself for how she’d been trying to literally write the wrongs that was Twilight. She hated that that book had even gotten a hold of the hive mind of society. It wasn’t vampires. Not the way they should be. Not the way Tina imagined them. It had made her very determined to set things right. “No one. It’s why I change my number just about every time I change countries. It’s a weird habit, I know. How about you? What brings you here?”
There was a light shrug of Kurt’s slender shoulder. “I’ve always been here, darling. There’s very little that makes me leave these days. It’s the city that never sleeps, and that’s... somewhat fitting. It’s easy to become a creature of the night here.” He gave her a wink and pointed. “See what I did there? Wasn’t that clever? Vampires, right? That’s what you write about? I can’t imagine what would have given you a notion to right about such fantasy, but I hear you have done really well for yourself, no? Twilight, eat your heart out. And I’m glad to hear I’m a nice surprise. Some wouldn’t concur with that sentiment. Most think I’m dead,” he offered with a brief laugh and a small dismissive flick of his perfectly manicured fingers.
“Career and college brought me here. I just never left, despite popular opinion. I’ve been so busy, I lost touch with everything. The life of a celebrity is demanding, and there is only so many hours of sunlight in the day, right?” he continued and shifted on his stool to toy with his glass again. “Let me buy you a drink, darling. So, there is no one from Lima you stayed in touch with?” he added, his cool blue eyes once again intent on her gaze.
Tina’s head cocked at his choice of words before she finally just smiled and laughed. “Well, yes. There is that. Another reason why I’m here. Where better to get a burst of inspiration than New York? I’ve been here a few times but never really stayed.” Tina finally moved to take the empty stool next to him and made herself comfortable before she looked at Kurt again, the smile fading just slightly. “I can’t deny I was one of those who had started to believe the rumours. It’s a nice surprise because I’m just really glad you’re not dead. I’ve actually missed you. I mean, I don’t get to swap sweaters with anyone these days. No one has quite the same taste as you. And yes, I write about vampires. Pretty predictable, huh? Someone has to redeem their reputation though. That series did nothing but corrupt a whole generation into thinking vampires were sparkly douchebags.”
She nodded in agreement, understanding completely even if she was a different form of celebrity. She at least still had some credit among the literary circle. It wasn’t all just blockbusters and a flash in the pan obsession with her books. Tina had refused to give up the rights to her book for a long time because she had yet to meet a director or studio that could do her vision justice. “Thank you, I’d appreciate it. Whatever you’re having is fine. Not really. I mean there’s the odd email at Christmas where everyone sums up what they’ve been doing, but nothing of any substance. I feel sad about, but this is growing up, right? This is being an adult.”
Kurt waved his hand up and down his length. “Well, as you can see, I’m very much still in this world. It’s going to take more than bit of an accident to knock a Hummel down...” Even if it was a lot more than just a bit of an accident. The car had hit him and almost killed him on impact. If Aidan hadn’t been ‘conveniently’ nearby with a sense Kurt was in danger, nothing would have saved him. As it was, it all happened so quickly and Kurt was technically taken against his will, so to speak. Boy, did that lead to some extensive silent treatment once he learnt the ins and outs of things. Even to this day, he still used it to his advantage. He was pretty sure Aidan didn’t know what hit him picking Kurt that day. He was feisty and very much brought his sassy gay bitch attitude with him. “And also take pride in designing my own sweaters these days. Some of us had to make it out of Lima and succeed right? Oh, my favourite was the undead conceiving new life. As if that wasn’t enough, the child wanted to eat the mother. How unclassy...”
He glanced at his glass, still filled to capacity with a dark red wine. “Expensive taste, it’s lucky I’m rich,” he noted and then delicately snapped his fingers to get the barman’s attention and placed an order for another glass of the French red. “I must have conveniently fallen off people’s contact lists. I don’t spend a lot of time emailing these days, so I probably brought it on myself. And I know people a lot older than you, darling. You’re just a pup. Many good years of you ahead yet. Live a little. You never know when it could be all over, just like that,” he said lowly, a snap of his fingers to emphasis as his eyes made their way back to hers.
Tina made a gagging noise as she thought about that horrible birth scene. It was actually enough to turn her off the idea of giving birth to just a human child. She was amazed any teen girl had survived reading it with any maternal feelings in tact. But she managed a smile as she looked at Kurt and his clothes before finally breaking eye contact to look behind the bar as she studied the drink array. “Actually, one of the first things I did when I had a comfortable enough paycheck was to buy one of your sweaters. I adore it. It felt like I’d bought a piece of fashion history because I knew it was yours. Your design. I was so proud. Being an author doesn’t exactly pay immediately, so it wasn’t like I was splurging from the start. Are you okay, though? Did the accident leave you with any lasting injuries?”
She bit her lip briefly before smiling apologetically. “I’m sorry, I really didn’t mean to pick anything so expensive. I just assumed it would be easier. I’m happy with cheap alcohol. Even if you might judge me. “Would you even bother with emailing them even if you did?” Tina asked with a slightly teasing look. “It’s not as if I never wanted to contact you. I think I just got scared I’d get back some scary skull with a whole ‘KURT IS DEAD’ animated logo. Which is stupid, I know. Guess I didn’t let go of everything. So you’re frolicking with older types, hm? Do tell. Is there anyone in your life I should know about?”
Kurt found himself hit with a wave of nostalgia, but he didn’t outwardly show any distinct shift in emotion. As far as he was concerned, Tina walking into the bar tonight was fate. It helped seal a choice firmly in his mind, and as much as he wanted to interrogate her about a certain someone, he maintained self-control on that front. He would need to do some more searching before he made any rash decision, figuring that if she had any information, she would have supplied it when he asked. Unless she was avoiding the subject, but he wasn’t sensing any discomfort from her. Maybe some uncertainty, but no discomfort to indicate she was lying to him. “Well, when NYADA screwed me over in favour of a crazy stalker, I had to find a Plan B. I just never expected it to change my life on the level that it did. And I’m perfectly fine, darling. It was all over-hyped, apparently. Just a bunch of media whores searching for a good story. I wasn’t even left with a scratch.” He was fortunate on that front that it happened quickly enough that he maintained his appearance prior to the damage the car did to him. Any longer, and it would have been ghastly.
“It’s pocket change to me. My treat. Beautiful people deserve beautiful things. We’re more than entitled,” he said with an arrogant sniff. “And no, I really wouldn’t. These days, I do very little I don’t want to. For a long time people did believe me to be deceased. I had to recuperate and I had to do it out of the public eye. I had... friends who protected me and took care of me. I was lucky. And no, darling, there is no one you should know about,” he told her with a sweet, tight-lipped smile. At least, no one he was going to share with her when he didn’t trust her as far as he could brush lint from her shoulder.
Tina had heard snippets about Blaine, but she had no idea where he and Kurt stood and she really didn’t know enough to get involved. She didn’t know if Blaine would want her sharing what she did know. She didn’t even know if Kurt wanted to know. It was strange to be talking to her former classmate after all this time. Someone she had once considered a good friend and to now feel like she had no idea what to say even if there was a part of their rhythm that appeared easy to get back. “You could have just told me it was over-hyped. You have no idea how hard I cried because I never got to return to you the green Dolce sweater. And then decided that if I still had it then maybe you would be alive because you wouldn’t want to leave this earth without wanting it back.” Tina shrugged a little before smiling softly. “I’m so glad you’re okay.”
Tina whistled low before breaking into a grin. “I’m glad I still fit under your beautiful people category. I’d hate to make you feel like you were wasting your pocket change. I also hope that you’ve spent some of that change on my novels and not just watch people give a dramatic reading over YouTube. I can’t even imagine what you must do with all that media attention. I can handle the occasional chat show but just the idea of the paparazzi constantly up in my face is terrifying. I have literally embraced being a recluse unless it’s nights like these and then I go full Goth just to throw people off my amazing Asian scent.”
“It’s okay, darling. That’s not a sweater I would have chosen to be buried in. I don’t think I was missing it. I am still not sure how anyone believed I was still designing from the grave, considering I had new collections out, but that stupid rumour hit the internet that I was pulling a Tupac and had catalogues of designs discovered in my studio or something that people were constructing after my demise. It’s not so. All my work takes blood, sweat and tears. Mostly blood, and just not always my own, but that’s beside the point. Once your death hits the internet, it’s very hard to make the conspiracy theorists believe otherwise. But as you can see, I’m here in the flesh, so of course I’m still here,” Kurt scoffed, even if he was selecting his words extremely carefully. He watched her closely and nodded. “I’ve been worse, darling. I promise. I’m as much to blame over the lack of contact as anyone else.”
He just laughed lightly. “I don’t mix with the unbeautiful these days. Consider yourself fortunate,” he joked and went back to nursing his own glass. “I have never read your work. But don’t take that personally. It’s just not my personal taste. The media is easy, I adore attention. The more the better, and I look fabulous enough, so why not have it all? I deserve it. I’ve worked hard enough. Some celebrities these days shouldn’t be anywhere near a camera, it’s appalling. Gothic, at its most finest, is stunning, darling. Have you ever thought about injecting more of the olde worlde into your novels?” Maybe then she would get some accuracy up in that business.
Tina frowned slightly at her own stupidity before she shook her head and buried her face in her hand. “Oh god, I’m so stupid! So, so stupid. Sooner or later I should realise that the internet is not actually full of the truth. I mean, this is the same source of information that leaked the “ending” to my third novel. Apparently there was an undead pregnancy but this one involved holy water. I’m not telling you more than that. I should have just contacted you outright. I have loved each of your collections though. I’m actually kind of glad that you got rejected from NYADA because you get this chance to give the world your unique taste.”
Tina smirked a little before she finally picked up her glass of red and took a small sip. He was right, it really was an expensive drop. She could taste it in the first sip alone. She didn’t pretend to know a lot about wine, but she knew she should feel honoured even tasting this red. “Wow... that’s... thank you for the drink, Kurt. Even that sip alone was worth it. And so was bumping into you. You look so... stunning. Definitely not a dead man walking. And no, it’s okay. I didn’t really think it would ever be your taste but I thought you might have suffered through it for my sake.” Tina’s eyebrow quirked slightly as she looked at him. “More of the olde worlde how? Like... ancestry?”
Kurt quirked an eyebrow at her when she rambled a little about the whole internet thing. She was nervous, he could feel it off her, but at the same time, he really couldn’t blame her. He hadn’t exactly done a whole lot to allay those conspiracy theories because the more ambiguity about where he was and what he was doing, the easier it was for him to remain concealed. It prevented too many people trying to get close and sniff around him, because frankly, he was still an infant with all of this and he wasn’t sure he was ready to try and let his family and friends get too close to him yet. He didn’t know how to interact with them as he was now, and it made him nervy. Making him nervy was never a good thing. It had led to a few disasters that Aidan had his hands full with when it happened, but Kurt was still learning. It was a process. But he was solely focused on one thing lately, and any tiny link to it, he would risk his fears to get information. Tina was an extremely conveniently placed source at the moment, and Kurt was going to use it. “The amount of things that involve Holy Water on the internet is mind-boggling these days,” he joked with a thin, veiled smile. “Don’t beat yourself up, though. I mean this with all due respect, but the more you tried to gain access to me, the harder it would have been to get to me.”
She was an author, she could read into that statement what she wanted, but he wasn’t going to elaborate. Every interaction he had these days, he preferred to be on his terms, in his control. It was the only way he could cope. He could never shake the sense he was incomplete or with a gaping hole of loss inside him, though he was assured it was probably just because certain events had occurred against his will in the past. He was pretty sure that had nothing to do with it, though. But he did have to laugh at her backhanded compliment, knowing she had no idea of the depth of it. “Well, you would know all about dead men walking, darling. Who am I to talk? And you don’t need my opinion on your work. Your work is your own, you make it whatever you want it to be. Approval first comes from within. And I mean more of the historical artistic side of Gothic. It was an art way, way before it was black nail polish and lacy clothing with skull cameo brooches. Twelfth century Paris is a stunning era... so many secrets to be told or interpreted, as what fiction is. Just because someone is interpreting something and manufacturing it between the pages of a book, does not make it real or accurate. A fact a lot of people prefer to forget and be swept up in the comforting nook of fantasy.”
Tina was trying to relax and she couldn’t deny the wine was helping. She took another sip before she was looking at him again but this time there was a little confusion, maybe even hurt in her expression. She could understand to a degree if he’d wanted to limit contact after the accident, but the fact that he had just seemed to cut himself off completely hurt. Then the fact that he would tell his “people” not to let her, or anyone else contact him hurt more. “So why are you letting me talk to you now? What’s changed to consider me worthy of even breathing your air?” She couldn’t help asking the question. She knew she shouldn’t, but it was there right on the tip of her tongue and apparently she wasn’t just going to mention the elephant in the room but just walk right up and lick it.
However as if flicking a switch, but when the conversation steered back towards the creative world her eyes lit up and she got a crooked smile. “Oh, well, if that’s what you mean then I think I might actually enjoy that. It would certainly mean that I could explore the origins better. Return to basics as it were instead of focusing on vampires in the modern world. It really is starting to feel a bit overdone. Mostly because I keep waiting for the publishers to push for a wedding or a birth or vampire children that can read minds. I mean, really... there’s only so much readers are willing to take a leap of faith with when they’re not teenage girls.” She tilted her head slightly as she took a careful sip of wine and seemed to consider all the possibilities. “I can practically write the opening on a napkin right now. I honoured you, you know. In one of my novels.”
Kurt’s teeth ran along the inside of his lip, and it took all his effort not to sassily bite back that they really weren’t sharing the same air anyway. But that would just open a can of worms he really had no intentions of going near. Instead, his tongue just traced slowly over his lips and the tip of his fingers explored the rim of his wine glass. “I’m a distinct believer in fate, darling. We’re here in the same place, at the same time, for a reason, and that is more than enough for me. In fact, I was just about to leave and still, we crossed paths. I think that’s a sign, don’t you?”
He was listening to her closely and intently. “Well, if vampires were in the modern world, I am sure one by now would have called you on your misleading information, darling. Or perhaps they’re just really good at being concealed,” he suggested with a laugh that indicated it was all just fictional fairy tales anyway and the idea of a vampire walking up to her to put her right was humorous. “It would certainly make for an interesting research interview for you, though. Robert Pattinson wouldn’t have had that little luxury. Teenage girls know no more about vampires or historical fact than I know about inserting a penis into a vagina. You honoured me? How so? Should I be concerned?” he teased.
“Well, yes. Of course. You do have me there. Like I said, it’s a really nice surprise. Some days it feels as if you never existed at all other than the fact that I remember you, and so do the others.” Tina smiled again though before raising her glass in a toast. “To fate and signs. Does this mean you might actually keep contact once we leave here, or is tonight all I get as far as fate goes?” She looked at him hopefully, unable to help it. She was only now starting to realise how much she’d missed having him to talk to.
Tina snorted in amusement. “Or maybe they hate me for sullying their reputations and their plotting a mass revolt. Though if Twilight didn’t make them come out of the woodwork I can’t imagine my novels would. I like the idea that they could be concealed though. That maybe they really do exist.” She shrugged with a laugh. “But I’m sure you think I’m still just ridiculously out of touch with reality. If any vampires were actually willing to give me an interview I might actually either pee myself with excitement or just scream and run away. Either way I think I’d just embarrass myself. And yes, I did. I wrote a homoerotic vampire story. You were the inspiration for one of the lovers.”
“Oh, I’m sure if our schedules allow it, darling, we can fit each other into our busy lives, no? That is depending if you remain in New York on a more permanent basis. The only time I really leave is to go overseas. I have... friends who are British and connected to France, so I’m a frequent flyer. Always somewhere to stay on publicity for my work. No matter how nearly dead I was, apparently people still want to wear my designs. It’s probably a good thing I didn’t decease or I would just be another notorious name someone else is designing for and I personally couldn’t think of anything worse. It would be like if you passed over and someone kept writing under your name. You would want to come back and haunt them,” Kurt pointed out, smirking. “Or perhaps beat them with your prior novels... the hardcover editions.”
He tilted his head slightly. “On the contrary, if they were wanting to be concealed, perhaps your work is a fine enough and respected red herring? And for that, maybe they are grateful for your existence. Who doesn’t like a good alibi when they’re trying to hide something? Or maybe even just a case of you exist in your world, and they exist in theirs, and never the twain shall meet, hm? Put it this way, though, if you were doing it wrong and disturbing someone’s peace, you wouldn’t be a successful and rich author. You would have been knocked off your pedestal well before now, so just bask in it, darling. If you find the recipe of success, the demand for your product will only get better. Homoerotic vampires, huh? Hopefully they know proper teeth etiquette in blow jobs... and what was my lover like? Hot, I hope. I’m entitled to only the finest of ass,” he added with a wink.
Tina’s eyebrows went up before she let out a gasp of excitement. “No wonder you suggested going back to the original Gothic roots of France. You’re lucky being able to travel that much. I have to for publicity but the rest of the time I just settle wherever I’ve travelled to for a few years before going to another place. I never really get to enjoy it unless I’m there for good. It’s why I was thinking about coming to New York for a while but now you have me wondering about France. Guess I’ll just have to see what fate has in store, hm? See if staying here does allow me a little of your time now and then.” She nodded in agreement though as she raised her glass once more. “Amen to that. I would beat them with the hard covers and not even think twice about it. No one will ever be you, Kurt. You’re one of a kind.”
She was looking at him quizzically once more but she just smiled off the questions he was raising. Something about the conversation was so strange. Like he shouldn’t be able to talk about vampires so easily but here Kurt was. Indulging her. “Well, yes. I could understand that. Even if a part of me really is itching to find out what it’s really like. To know if I have anything right. And then if I have it all wrong, I don’t know. I don’t know if I’d change the world I’ve created. And yes, teeth etiquette was a must and your lover was incredibly hot. Much like that dark-haired guy in the Tudors we always used to drool over.”
“The modern day interpretation of ‘goth’,” Kurt began, making little quotation marks with his fingers, “could probably be considered extremely offensive to what it truly is. Alas, back in those centuries, there wasn’t black nail polish, eyeliner and fishnet stockings. There wasn’t Rammstein to listen to or websites to go on and commiserate with your fellow emos. Most of whom would probably fall off their black-bedspreaded beds to realise there is actually a true historical existence of Gothic that has nothing to do what they’re involved in. Twilight is...” He just laughed then, looking down at the polished bar top that he traced circles over with his finger. “It’s fiction. What more can I say? As is modern day ‘gothic’. I would think people who existed in actual Gothic France would be rolling over in their graves at it all. Or, if you believe vampires exist, rolling their eyes extensively in the current day and amused that Dracula got the better of everyone.”
He swivelled on his stool and leant back against the bar with his elbow draped on it. His legs were crossed over at his knees and he drank in the interior of the bar and the crowd for a few moments, eyes surveying the scene. There was a Kindred woman over in the corner watching him keenly, Toreador no doubt... they had sensed each other as soon as they entered the room but a respectful distance had been kept so far. Hopefully it wasn’t another one of Aidan’s minions keeping a check on him. “New York is lovely, though. Many, many secrets like any city, but what is a city worth exploring if there is nothing there to discover? Itching to find out what being a vampire is really like, darling? Or what it is like to know they exist? I can’t imagine it would be much fun... and fine choice of fellow leading man. I have to admit, I have a weakness for the dark and handsome with nice asses.”
Tina pressed her lips together thoughtfully before she smoothed a hand down the ruffles of her jacket. There was one benefit to wearing Gothic inspired clothes and that was the fact it always made her sit up straight. It kept her posture very rigid. She glanced at a passing guy, sizing him up and down before she crinkled her nose a little. “Where do you think it really went wrong? It’s not all about those particular cliches. It had to have gone wrong somewhere. Most likely it was always when it was in the hands of an American. When some famous person butchered the look and everyone copied it. I don’t pretend to have gotten it right this whole time. I’ve tried to trace it back, return the roots so that I don’t have the original people rolling in their graves or vampires thinking I’m a joke.” She left her glass on the bar and reached up to run her fingers through her dark hair. “I think it’s only right that I do continue to return to the roots of all things gothic. I mean, hell, it was even a Sims 3 furniture back in the day.”
“I remember,” she murmured as he mentioned dark and handsome with nice asses. Just as well he never specified tall otherwise Blaine would have been in trouble. She rest her chin in her hand as she looked at him while she braced her elbow against the bar. “Kurt, can I ask you a serious question without you laughing at me? And it’s not about wanting to know what it’s like to be one, though I suppose that’s part of it. I mean, are they sad? Are they lonely? Or do they just hang with other vampires all the time. Do they ever truly love mortals or is that just us being wishful thinkers. Can they love given they’re not entirely human. But anyway, I know you can’t possibly want to spend this whole time talking about vampires. My question is actually related to where we started. Do you think we had our true loves? That our chance at it is just... over?”
Kurt shrugged a slender shoulder. “Merely pop culture, darling. It influences all of us, and for some more than others, it was a huge factor of building what we become as adults. Pop culture caters to people wants to rebel, be different, step out of the box, but it also caters to those who want to be lemmings or sheep and just follow the conformists. But what is put out there for us to absorb is what dictates everything. All it takes is for something to gain a following and it becomes a culture of its own. Your fanbase, for example. You’ve made yourself your own little piece of prized real estate in current pop culture, and that’s something to be proud of. You are influencing the way a large bunch of people are thinking and acting. When you think about it, it’s really quite a phenomenon. Influencing someone, or controlling what they do or how they react is really quite... invigorating,” he mused lightly. One of his developed skills he had come to be quite fond of, especially in using it for his own gain.
He rested his tongue between his lips and glanced at her casually. Short was always something Kurt had discovered a taste for in finding Blaine. Perhaps it turned out to be more of a curse than a blessing these days, in that his taste solely lay in people with talent and he always seemed to be more satisfied with the vertically challenged. He didn’t know if he was just projecting in what his heart was yearning for, but he was still very much learning to find his feet in this new life. “What is wishful thinking in a mortal falling for an immortal? Don’t you think, in essence, there wouldn’t be anything more heartbreaking than living forever and knowing that in comparison of your own existence, you have but a blip of time with your love? And I would argue that they are human, they’re just undead. But who am I to assume? You’re the expert, not me. I didn’t even like Interview with the Vampire, book or movie. I have never been able to come to Tom Cruise, no matter how short he is. And no. I don’t believe any connection of the soul is ever truly over. I don’t even believe it’s over when we... pass on.”
Tina couldn’t resist preening just a little bit. She flicked her ponytail as she grinned before batting her lashes and raising her wine glass once more. “Cheers to both of us having an impact on current culture. I know I kept wondering if you were alive or dead, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t had your designs seep through my subconscious. Also using Hayden Christensen for one of your campaigns was a masterstroke. I still just want to climb him and have my way with him, but hey. We can’t all get every dream we want. He’ll forever be my unobtainable one. I just don’t want my work to have a negative impact on pop culture. I’ve spent so long respecting it, respecting all the literature and songs and music and films that have influenced me... It’s hard to explain. I don’t want to be Rachel,” she finally finished with a laugh as she shot Kurt a look that was both slightly embarrassed and unashamedly devillish. Both of them had such a love-hate relationship with their former classmate.
Tina cleared her throat before nodding her head in agreement. “Which is exactly the trouble with writing this fiction. It’s not always about a happy ending. It’s not always about the vampire turning their lover so that they can be together forever. Sometimes it’s about that little blip of time and recording it for posterity. I love writing this genre but sometimes you just know it’s doomed from the beginning. Sometimes you just know that no matter how much you pour into the words it’s not going to end the way the readers might want.” Tina shrugged almost as if she was admitting defeat but the smile that shone through after was unmistakable. “Kind of like life. I mean, I get that romance should be an escape but it’s not always the focus. Sometimes I just want to write about vampires having adventures and sometimes I just want to write about the humans that adore them. So you still feel a connection to you-know-who?”
Kurt just smirked. “He contacted me and I was busy that week. My management mostly dealt with it. I hear he was lovely, though, so I don’t have to burst your bubble by telling you that your crush was a dickwad. You should tap that, darling. You’re more woman than Rachel Bilson will ever be. You actually have tits, that’s a good start.” More to the fact the shoot was midday in the middle of a beach in the French Riviera slap-bang in the middle of summer. He couldn’t have been present even if he wanted to, but the Star Wars actor had been a perfect height for the texture and patterning of Kurt’s collection, so it had all been very convenient. As nice as he was, Kurt just didn’t like them taller than him. The irony, considering he used to crush on Finn once upon a time that felt like forever ago. “It is impossible for anyone to be Rachel but Rachel, and considering she is already a washed-up has-been who can only get off-Broadway parts these days, at best, it’s hardly a fair comparison.”
His eyes cooled a little at this and he gave her a somewhat empty stare, almost like he was looking right through her. “You can say his name, he’s not Voldemort.” He turned his gaze to the woman in the corner and it locked for a long passing few moments, Kurt more than letting her know he was not only aware of her presence but the fact she was watching him. “Romance is often the most tragic and painful thing of all, darling. It consumes you, it devours you, and when it does that, it stays with you forever. If it ends before you’re ready, and you never say goodbye, your heart never truly believes it’s over. Sometimes, a heart is impossible to reason with. It wasn’t made to reason... if it was, we wouldn’t have been given brains.”
“Mm, if only. I wouldn’t even know how to tap him. Just because I have my own corner of the pop culture universe it doesn’t mean I run in those circles. I can’t just call him up for a booty call. He doesn’t know me from any other random creeper. I just wish you had, like, candid photos or something. That would have been amazing. Maybe one of these days we’ll wind up at the same press event. Or I’ll finally give up the rights to my books and he’ll star in one of the movies.” Tina smiled a little impishly before she took a sip of her wine. She still had the advertisements saved in her YouTube favourites, and a thousand gifs of it reblogged on her Tumblr. She was still a child of her times at heart. She just knew how to hide it now and again. “Okay, point. I was just saying. I also feel a little bad that I might have laughed when I read she got fired from that last big role.”
Tina’s skin seemed to break out in goosebumps at the stare but she said nothing. Didn’t dare question the look because in all honestly she was starting to wonder what he might do. “Blaine,” she finally said quietly. Then she frowned as she realised where his gaze had gone once more. If it had been any other guy she’d be wondering if he wanted to pick her up. But this was Kurt. He didn’t do women. “We still need brains to function. To send signals to the rest of our bodies. But our hearts would do the thinking. But I think I like that hearts are impossible to reason with. It wouldn’t be fun if they weren’t. We wouldn’t get impulses. We wouldn’t work on our desires. Such a catch twenty-two, huh?”
Kurt gave an indifferent shrug. “You’re a celebrity, think like a celebrity, darling. We can insert ourselves into the presence of others easily. Next time he’s at a business party, you can be my plus one. I’ll introduce you. And there you go. Consideration of making your books movies would be a fantastic kick-off for a conversation. Showbiz talk is always where it starts, even if we all profess not to want to talk shop when we’re off the clock. Deep down, we thrive on bragging about our achievements.” His long finger casually and slowly pushed his untouched glass of wine over the bar and away from him. It wasn’t like he had any intentions of consuming it.
“Blaine...” he repeated coolly after her, the name hanging in the air even as he fell silent. He paused to let the sensation of even just the name overcome him, and the restless, unsettled stirrings started to bubble up inside him, and he shot the woman in the corner a slight warning glare that she really, really shouldn’t come near him right now. He wasn’t feeling in a very accommodating mood for others of his kind all of a sudden. “And what is a Catch Twenty-two in vampire years, darling? You know what, I just realised the time. I really should be going. I have an early start in the morning. It was fabulous seeing you again. You should call me.” He took his business card from the inner pocket of his jacket draped over the back of his stool and slid it across the bar to her. He gave her some light kisses to both her cheeks, and then blew her another from his fingertips... right before he was, disappearing from the bar in a smooth yet pointed saunter. He needed sustenance, and he needed it now, but he knew if he stayed, Tina was going to be too much of a temptation for him and he just couldn’t do that to a friend, no matter how estranged they had been.
RP LOG, SCENE COMPLETE